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The JOY of Networking

The Ambassador Of JOY, Barry Shore, is THRILLED to host the giant of Networking, Joe Apfelbaum. Joe is the CEO of Ajax Union a B2B digital marketing agency. He is the author of High Energy Networking, a book that teaches professionals how to build mutually beneficial relationships in business. He is an acclaimed LinkedIn Trainer teaching sales professionals how to network EFFECTIVELY on LinkedIn. You will be mesmerized as Barry and Joe discuss insights that will BENEFIT YOU. Immediately. Definitely an Episode to Listen Repeatedly. And SHARE.

Listen to the podcast here:

Show Notes:

  • 00:45 – Barry’s rousing introduction
  • 14:17 – Joe Apfelbaum on The JOY of Networking
  • 24:40 –What is your most fervent desire?
  • 41:55 – Why it’s important to unpack something right now?
  • 52:21- Barry’s Interesting Wrap-up

Important Links:

Barry Shore:

I can’t think of anybody that inspires noble deeds that’s going to inspire you to soar into the world more than our dear friend Joe Apfelbaum. Joe, please say hello to 357,228 people around the world.

Joe Apfelbaum:

Thank you for having me. I’m really excited about hearing all the acronyms. The acronyms are incredible. So, thank you so much for having me here. Hello, everybody, welcome, welcome. I love the gratitude bit. What I heard about gratitude a short while ago is gratitude is the feeling of already having received. So, if you feel like you already received it you’re going to behave that way. And you’re going to end up attracting what you want in your life. And I’m a very, very big fan of attracting joy, of attracting love, of attracting kindness. And so, if you want to get more joy in your life you have to be in that state. And in order to be in the state you can’t just think your way into it. You have to be because we’re not human doings we’re humans being. Joy is something that you are, that you become by being it, which means being in gratitude, being in a higher vibration, being on a different plane, not the plane of surviving but instead the plane of thriving.

Barry Shore:

Thriving. So, this is why I have asked Joe to join us and he fit us into his schedule because this man is in demand. He is the essence of the law of attraction because people want to be around this being. By the way, I just want to mention to you wonderful Joe, love is a fabulous acronym since you mentioned vibration. It stands for living on vibrating energy. Living on the vibrational plane because that’s you. And you talked about law of attraction. Law, when people hear the word, law, law, something impressive. Law stands for love, and wisdom. So, let’s talk about you because you’re the chief hen, and you’re going to lay a big egg. And I’ll give you acronyms for both of those. Let’s just jump right in and talk about high energy, networking in joy. The stage is yours dear sir. We have hundreds of thousands of people all over the world, most of them under the age of 38. And they’re educated and they’re curious, they’re thirsting for what you have to share with us. Hen that stands for high energy networking. So, please talk to us about your book, what you do, by the way, everything you want to know about Joe, you don’t have to write anything down. Everything’s going to be at my website barryshore.com. Just go to barryshore.com. Everything about Joe is there. Just lean in and let this transforming of being help transform you for the better. Joe, high energy networking.

Joe Apfelbaum:

So 10 years ago, I had no idea that I was afraid of networking. I just thought that I like to meet people one on one. And I’m not the type of person that walks into a networking event and meets people. I didn’t even know that networking was a thing. But when I found out about it, I said you know what, let me check it out. Let me check out a networking event. Let me go meet other CEOs, let me go meet other professionals, let me go meet other people in sales and get to know them, invite them to my event or invite them to my business or something. And so, I signed up for a Manhattan Chamber of Commerce networking event. And I showed up all excited wearing a nice little dress shirt. And when I came out of the elevator, I was in shock. I had no idea what hit me. I wanted to run away as fast as possible. And when you’re afraid, fear stands for false evidence that appears real. To me, it appeared like everybody was going to do something terrible to me. So, I tried to run away but the elevator wasn’t coming. So, I decided, let me go get a drink. I saw a very nice guy by the bar. I sat down with him. And he said, what can I order you? I said, I’ll get a beer. So, he got me a beer. And we sat talking and he said, do you know how to network? Have you been to these networking events? I said never been. And frankly, it’s my first time and I’m really scared. I’m really afraid. I don’t know what to do. So he said, I’m in life insurance. I’ve been networking for a really long time. This is what you should do. Reach into your pocket, take out all your business cards. He said, how many business cards do you have? I said, I brought 100. He said great. How many people are in the room, there’s 93 people in the room or whatever? Why don’t you just hand out your business card to everyone and then go home. And hopefully somebody will call you. And that’s what I did. I walked around, I was wearing Google cap, and I was promoting a seminar. And I just walked around, handed everybody the card in a very awkward way, and then I left. I left and I felt really bad. Do you know why? Because I know that what I did wasn’t the right way. I didn’t build any relationships. It was not joyful for me. And it was not joyful for the people that I handed a business card to. Now, people were gracious and they took the business card, and they said thank you very much. But it was weird. It was super non-human. Instead of being super human. I was being super non-human. Because my fear stopped me from thriving. I just wanted to survive and just get out of there as quickly as possible. And what I learned after that by reading books, by going to seminars, and by attending hundreds of networking events, and having thousands of conversations with people that I built meaningful relationships with is that networking is about connecting. Networking is about building real relationships. Not just about handing your business card to somebody and taking and hoping that they’ll want to buy something from you. But instead really getting to know someone, really having a conversation and figuring out okay, what is your story? What makes you tick? And for me, that’s fun. I thought that was just having friends. I thought that was just chilling. But networking needs to be joy, it needs to be fun. Because if it’s not fun you’re not going to want to do it. And most people are afraid of it. Because networking is very similar to public speaking. 90% of people are afraid to share their voice online because they’re afraid that somebody will judge them. And the biggest judge is ourselves, we end up judging ourselves for not being perfect. I hated the way that I sounded before I went on a podcast. I used to listen to it, and I used to cringe. And what I realized is that when I stopped judging myself all of a sudden the world stops judging me too. Because I am the world. I can observe everything around me and I can look at it as if it’s judging me in a negative light or I can be grateful for everything around me. And if I’m grateful for my contacts, my relationships, and I really get to know them then I can be great at networking.

Barry Shore:

So, let’s put you on pause for a moment because Joe, I’m happy to say, not only can go on speaking about great, wonderful, positive, purposeful, powerful things but he mentioned three things I just want to unpack for the audience then we’ll go deeper. One is F U, Joe. Remember, when was the last time you [crosstalk: 15:28]. F U double N. If it isn’t fun it’s not going to motivate. So, the important thing is make sure you want to have fun. Now, the other is that people know the negative acronym for fear. The other one, the more positive is face everything and rise up. Because that’s the genius of what he’s talking about. Now, you just gave me a new acronym, actually you gave me two. One is a new acronym for kind. Kind stands for keep connecting in networking daily.

Joe Apfelbaum:

You got to do it every day. If you don’t have a daily discipline, if you don’t have a discipline to do things on a regular basis it’s not going to grow. For example, bamboo. If you want bamboo to grow you need to water it every day. You need to be grateful every day, you need to shower it with blessings every single day. Now, it’s not going to grow right away. Bamboo, if you do any research on how bamboo grows, you realize you can water it every single day for a year, you can water it every single day for two years, and you can water it every single day for three years. And eventually in year four, in 90 days it shoots up like 40 feet. That’s the same thing with a relationship. You got to keep nurturing and adding value. Because the secret to living is giving.

Barry Shore:

One of the reasons I wanted Joe here is because we are kindred spirits or kindred souls. Because when people ask me, what is the joy of living, I say you can sum it up in one word, giving. When you recognize that you are a cog. Now, people think of a cog as something small in a big machine. But when you understand that the real essence again, uncovering the power and the secrets of everyday words and terms. A cog stands for channel of goodness. When you recognize that you are a channel of goodness, a child of God, then by definition, things happen that we call good in the world. So, this wonderful man who wrote the book called “High Energy Network.” And again, everything is available at my website barryshore.com. There it is high energy. He’s a hen. So, he just laid a huge egg. Egg stands for engaging, gargantuan, goodness. That’s what he does. Now, you see how he’s laughing and smiling because we’re networking right now. Everybody watching this, hundreds of thousands of people, what Joe and I are doing is we networking. We are conversating, to use millennial term, and we’re urging others to participate by listening, and understanding that what’s happening here is available to you. Remember, the reason you tuned is because you care the most about you. So, let’s go and talk about the idea of networking. Now, we’re going to take it from the broad aspect of networking and joy. Joy, by the way, stands for journey of you. Did you know that, Joe?

Joe Apfelbaum:

If you want to be great at networking, you have to figure out who you are. I have a whole chapter on figuring out who you are in the book. Understanding your strengths, understanding your values, understanding your purpose, your why If you don’t even know who you are how are you supposed to connect with somebody else? So, the journey of you begins with not being by yourself but being with yourself, getting to know yourself. Most people, they have a bad relationship with other people. And the reason we have a bad relationship with other people is not because the other person’s bad. It’s because they don’t even have a relationship with themselves. They haven’t taken the time to figure out who they are. If you’re not happy with you how are you going to be happy with them? A relationship is an entity on its own. And so, in order for you to be successful at a relationship you have to have a good relationship with you, stop judging yourself, and really connect with yourself. And the only way to do that is to accept your weaknesses by understanding that every weakness comes with it, a strength. Every weakness as a strength associated to it. So, I am a person that cannot finish. And I used to say oh, I’m procrastinating, I’m lazy, and I never finished. But the truth is, I’m a great starter. I’m actually an activator. There’s a book called “Strength Finder 2.0,” and he talks about the 34 human strengths. And every human has their top five strengths. You can do an assessment online to find your strengths. And once you figure out what your strengths are you can use them to help other people. For example, I have a strength called ideation. I’m an ideator. I love it. It gives me energy, it makes me feel joy. So, when I show up to a networking event what I can quickly do is give you 10 great ideas for how you can promote yourself. Or 10 great ideas of how you can take your life and your business to the next level. Because I’m an ideator. I’m also very strategic. What does it mean that I’m strategic? I can come up with really good plans for your business, for your life, for LinkedIn, for anything that you’re doing. But it also means that I need to rely on other people to execute for me because I’m not the best executer. I know what I’m good at. And so many times I used to focus on trying to fix my weaknesses instead of doubling down on my strengths. If you want to have joy in networking you can’t just trying to fix your weaknesses you have to figure out your strengths. You got to figure out your values. And you have to figure out your purpose, your why. So for me, my values are having curiosity, which means asking really great questions. If you want to be great at networking you have to be great at asking questions, getting to know people, probing. And so for me, it’s also about creativity, being creative. That’s why I’m on these podcasts. That’s why I write books. That’s why I do webinars and seminars. And I’m always teaching because I love being creative. I love rapping, I love singing, and I love doing all that stuff. And that’s why I love you so much. Because Barry, you are inspirational and you’re so creative. You’re so creative, and you match my value of creativity. And my third one is levity. Because I love having fun. I love making light of things. And I love joking around. And so, once I know what my values are I can find other people that match, that are compatible with my values. You can’t have joy in relationships if you’re networking with people, for me, for example, that hate asking questions, don’t like[inaudible: 21:57] ask questions, that hate creativity, and that don’t like having a good time. There are people that are like that believe it or not, and I am not compatible with those people. I might even be allergic to them. And that’s okay. It doesn’t mean that they’re bad. It just means that I need to focus my energy in the right places. And where focus goes energy flows. It’s really important for you to use all your energy and point it in the right direction. And when you use joy, gratitude, and love to propel you forward you become unstoppable. And you have the enthusiasm that will fill people up in a way that will make them attracted to you or repelled from you. And if they’re repelled from you, that’s great, let them go find somebody else to connect with. But if they’re attracted to you then you can make a difference in their life.

Barry Shore:

I’m going to unpack several things that you just gave. It was an aria, it wasn’t a talk. It was an aria, it was wonderful. And he said, where focus goes, everybody listen this again, where focus goes, energy flows. And be aware of your strengths. In order to be aware of your strengths you have to actually sit with yourself and speak with yourself. And not just think about, write down your five top strengths, as Joe just said. You may come up with 34 but choose 5.

Joe Apfelbaum:

You can actually take an assessment online if you just Google or you could put the link in the show notes on the website. There’s a StrengthsFinder assessment by the Gallup Center. You can buy the book and they give you the assessment for free or you can pay 20 bucks for the assessment. And if you take that assessment, it takes about 15, 20 minutes, we make all our employees take it because we want to put the right butts in the right seats. If you take that assessment you’ll know what your five strengths are and you’ll be able to put language to what you’re really, really good at in life.

Barry Shore:

And it’s so wonderful to be able to as you said, attract those you want to work with. Let’s be blunt, there are a lot of people in the world. And because of the networking capabilities now of online, the world is truly your oyster. If you like oysters, I happen to like pearls. I don’t want oysters it’s not kosher [crosstalk: 24:11]. We want to find the pearl and therefore there are so many people don’t worry about those that are repelled by you. It’s okay. Just love the ones that you’re with. That’s a great song by the way, love the one you’re with. Now, by the way interesting enough, Joe repel, I just realized as I’m looking at it. If you look at it backwards the word is leper. So the people you repel that’s okay, that’s the way it’s supposed to be. I’m going to make you go wild and then we’re going to talk about some practical in depth thing. I’m going to see if you can read this card.

Joe Apfelbaum:

Be an ask hole.

Barry Shore:

Ask hole and thrive. So, what does ask hole stand for? Ask stands for always seek kindness and a hole help others live exuberantly. Because when you help others live exuberantly, guess what happens? By definition, that’s how you’re living. You can’t help but do that. Okay, Joe, let’s get really deep and practical. I want you to lay that egg, engaging, gargantuan goodness. Give us some specifics where your expertise is so remarkable. One of the most highly praised networkers on LinkedIn is Joe Apfelbaum. You listening to him right now. I mean, this guy rocks it when it comes to LinkedIn. So, let’s give two maximum, three practical tips and tools that people can use right away when they go to the show notes and say, wow, I’m going to do that because it works. Okay, lay it on us, baby. You’re laying the egg.

Joe Apfelbaum:

LinkedIn is the largest professional social network in the world. There are 800 million members on LinkedIn. 40% are logging in every day. So Microsoft owns LinkedIn. They paid $26.2 billion for LinkedIn in 2016. And it’s a powerful platform. It’s different than Facebook and Instagram where people put pictures of their food or their friends. This is a professional network, a place where you meet CEOs, where you connect with people, where you build relationships. And if you don’t use LinkedIn right now to network professionally you’re missing out on a massive opportunity. Now, the people that are using LinkedIn most of them are lurkers, that means they’re just watching. And if you’re just watching and you’re not taking action you’re not going to get results. Results doesn’t come from just watching, results come from taking action. Once you have a solid strategy for LinkedIn, which understanding what your goals are, who the people are that you’re targeting, and of course, what your messaging is, you have your stories in place, you optimize your profile, and you have some automations in place. The three major actions that I want you to do every single day is number one is, get awareness. How do you get awareness? It’s by posting something of value on LinkedIn. Barry posts things all the time, I post things all the time. Out of the millions and millions of people that are on LinkedIn only a million posts go up a day, and most of them come from me.

Barry Shore:

By the way, he’s not kidding.

Joe Apfelbaum:

Most people are not posting on LinkedIn. And I get millions of people to see me every single year on LinkedIn because I simply just put myself out there. I add value by posting. And we teach people the six different types of posts to put on LinkedIn. But the key is make sure that you’re getting awareness with LinkedIn. Because if no one knows that you exist, or you’re not top of mind with people they’re not going to refer business to you. The second thing you want to do is you want to build credibility. How do you build credibility on LinkedIn? Is by being real. How do you become real? By engaging, liking, commenting, sharing, adding value. I love commenting on the people that I love, on the people that bring me joy, on the people that I want to stay top of mind with. And when I comment on their posts I become real. I’m not just a person that’s just an avatar. But I’m a person with an opinion, I’m person that’s adding value, I’m a person that’s showing love to the people in my life. So, if you want to be credible to somebody start engaging. Pick 10, 15 centers of influence, and make sure that on a daily basis that you’re engaging on their content. And number three, the third most important thing when it comes to LinkedIn is have conversations offline with people. How do you do that? You do that through the DM. You have a conversation. And obviously not selling because selling is smelling. What you want to do is instead you want to be nurturing people just like you nurture the bamboo, you want to be adding value, greeting, feeding, and meeting is the process of nurturing your contacts on LinkedIn. The New Year’s is coming. So, tip for everybody here, take all your connections that you have on LinkedIn and send them a direct message, say Happy New Year’s, or happy holidays or hope you’re doing well. Connect with them, add value to them, and then take them through the nurturing process. And we walk you through this entire process. You may not have time to cover the whole thing here. But know that if you have awareness, and you have credibility, and you have conversations, you’re going to be more successful and get to your goals.

Barry Shore:

Let’s call that ACE. Here’s the ACE. I’m just making it up because you gave it to me. A is awareness, C is credibility, and number three is engage [crosstalk: 29:10]. 

Joe Apfelbaum:

It’s the ace in the hole. Awareness, credibility, and conversations. But engaging people in engaging conversations if you don’t do that you’re not going to be able to build real relationships. Real relationships don’t happen by just connecting. Most people are hoarding connections on LinkedIn. Because you can have up to 30,000 connections. So, don’t hoard connections. Instead build relationships, get to know people, have experiences with them. If you build real relationships you’re going to grow your business.

Barry Shore:

By the way, it’s so important to unpack something right now. What Joe is sharing with you is the wisdom of the ages. Awe by the way, is a great acronym, Joe. Ancient, wisdom, explains, educates. What you just said is the wisdom of the ages. In other words this is what should be taught in every family, every school, every church or synagogue or mosque, any place that people gather people should be speaking about this, which is giving for each other. And by definition you’re building. See, when you really want to build something you really want to gain more business, I say, the way to do it is by becoming a go-giver. If you become like you said, needy, and seedy, and selling is smelling. But if you offer people that which you are and do your service, your product, by definition, there’ll be people who want it because they want to do business with you. When you are authentic, and you’re creative, and you’re just being you. And people say, what is it that you have can I share that with you? Now, share is a great acronym it stands for, because this is what you do, Joe, you want to share. Share stands for spreading, happiness, and rejuvenating energy. So, you just outlined three fundamental pieces about LinkedIn. And by the way, we’re going to go for a quick break. We’ll be right back. Don’t go away. Everybody’s sending me chat notes saying, I need more, Joe. But you’ll have more, Joe. He’s going to come right back after this brief message. 

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Barry Shore:

Good day beautiful, bountiful, beloved immortal beings and good looking people. Remember you’re good looking so always looking for and finding the good. We have found good, we have a gold mine, we have a huge [unintelligible: 34:46] deposit here in this amazing being named Joe Apfelbaum. So, I would like if you be so kind Joe because people are asking, let’s narrow it even more. You’re talking about 800 million people on LinkedIn. That’s great. Ah, but 1 million are posting every day. You hear this everybody? That’s one out of 800. Excuse me, I think you want to be in that rarefied group of the one out of 800. Right, Joe, is that what you said?

Joe Apfelbaum:

100%. You want to make sure that you’re not trying to go viral. Going viral means getting COVID. And many of us already had COVID. But we don’t want that. What we want is instead of going viral is we want to be strategic. The right strategy will save you a decade. You can spend the next 10 years spinning your wheels trying to be famous. But you don’t need to be famous. You just need the right people to see you often. The right people. So, who are the right people for you? I want you to think about that. For me, it might be marketing directors, CEOs, sales trainers of specific types of companies. If you know who you want to connect with, you can easily with the right training, you can easily find them on LinkedIn, connect with them, nurture them, build a relationship with them, and stay top of mind. And that’s what’s going to drive revenue to your business. Anything that you need in life you get from your relationships. You get your trauma, we all needed our trauma to grow. And you also get healed from your trauma through your relationships. And so, your relationships will help you get to the next level. You are born because you were loved. You were loved that’s why you’re alive. If you weren’t loved as a child, if nobody loved you, you wouldn’t be able to thrive. Babies cannot thrive if they’re not loved. And your relationships cannot thrive if you don’t love them. But you can’t love your relationships if you don’t even know who they are. So with LinkedIn, you have to get to know the right strategy. Remember, your plan, your people, your promise, making sure you have the right written strategy. We teach our students the step by step process for how to create a strategy. We had a lawyer that joined our course recently in our coaching program, and he said, Joe, I have no idea how to use LinkedIn, I don’t know what to do. So we sat down, we created a strategy for him, we figured out his plan, his people, and we taught him the step by step process using our strategy framework for LinkedIn. Well, guess what? He’s doing $200,000 a year right now on LinkedIn, he’s a real estate lawyer. Same thing for real estate brokers, for mortgage brokers, for coaches, for consultants, for entrepreneurs, for IT guys, we teach you the step by step process of what to do on LinkedIn. But you have to have that foundation. If you don’t have a strategy, energy without strategy is a waste of time. Now, you can waste time, that’s okay. I don’t mind that. I don’t mind sometimes just chilling and relaxing. But that’s what Instagram is for. That’s what Facebook is for. Chilling, having a good time. When you’re on LinkedIn I want to make sure you’re being strategic. I want to make sure that you’re using leverage. Leverage means that you’re going to pick up something that’s much heavier that you can’t pick up yourself, leveraging technology, you’ll be able to finally have the joy, the peace, the freedom, the love. Because who loves drudging in the mud. Instead, what you want to do is you want to be able to fly. You want to be able to take a leap of faith so that you can have a better life.

Barry Shore:

And Joe has a proven strategy that works. This is the key. So if nothing else, if all you do is listen to this three times and act upon what he’s sharing with us, that’s great. I obviously urge everybody to get the book. Get the book, and then of course, read it and use it. And even consider taking his program, get in the course. Remember, he’s a hen, high energy networking. He lays big golden eggs, engaging gargantuan goodness, and it will be to your benefit because that’s what he cares about. See, his relationship with people is, I am here to bring value. Because that’s the only thing that makes him feel better. He really likes feeling good. The best way to make him feel good is to tickle him. But since I can’t tickle him right now, the best way to tickle him is use what he has available because he learned the best way and the hardest way. He went through stuff. As he told. He went to a networking meeting and he was a jerk. He gave out business cards. But you know something, that’s what 98% of the people do. Because unless somebody guides you, why would you think any other. This is what he is, he has become a guide and because of the world today we can have this. Let’s talk about two of the things because I know your time is very short. We’re going to have to close up shop in just a few minutes. But let’s hear if you’d be so kind, let’s take the attorney that you just mentioned. Tell us two strategies that you urged this person to do, and that he did, and what happened over the course of let’s say 60, 90 or 180 days.

Joe Apfelbaum:

So, strategy number one is posting the right way. So first of all, he wasn’t posting at all. And when he started posting he started posting the wrong way, included a link in his post. When you include a link in the post the algorithm shuns that post, you got to include the link in the comments. Another thing that he was doing is he wasn’t including hashtags. And the few times that he did include hashtags in his post he included hashtags that aren’t popular. So, we gave him our hashtag spreadsheet. And we give him the top 100 most popular hashtags on LinkedIn that have the most followers. And he started adding three to five hashtags that were popular in each post. And that 10x, the amount of people that were on his post that came to his post because he was using the right type of hashtags. The other thing that he wasn’t doing was he wasn’t direct messaging people. So, we started direct messaging people, and we analyzed his direct messages, and he was trying to just sell people. And I said, selling is smelling. We gave him our framework that has 365 greeting direct messages. And he picked the ones that match his personality the most. And he just started greeting his context. Well, that started turning into customers. When you start greeting people the right way, the right people, they are not alarmed all of a sudden. You’re not selling them anything. You’re being human, you’re being normal. So, we took him through our greeting, feeding and meeting process. And between the posting and the messaging, he’s able to generate $200,000 a year in revenue as a lawyer. And if you do the same, if you get awareness, if you get credibility, and if you start having real conversations by having a strategy, you’re much more likely to be successful.

Barry Shore:

As I said in the beginning, how much more time do we have, Joe? 

Joe Apfelbaum:

We probably have another eight minutes. 

Barry Shore:

Oh, wonderful. Okay, we’re going to go even deeper then because some of the things that I want to make mention to people, everybody’s heard of hashtags. But what Joe just shared with us is, it’s not just putting a hashtag that you think, oh, I like this hashtag. Everything he said is strategic. There’s a very fun game that people use to play a lot, a board game called Risk, or Stratego,

Joe Apfelbaum:

I love both of them. I’m very strategic. Like I said earlier, strategy is one of my top skills. So I love both of them,

Barry Shore:

It’s super important in the sense of understanding. You want to be able to have a large vision, and then you need to be able to bring it into a narrow cast, and make sure that it happens. So as Joe mentioned, for him, execution was not his strong suit. So guess what he did? He aligned himself with people who can execute. So, that was part of his strategy. Everybody should look up the idea of leverage. And look up a person named Archimedes. If you don’t know how to spell it we’ll spell it for you…. A-R C-H-I-M-E-D-E-S, Archimedes, look it up. He was in a city called Syracuse not in America but was in a place in the bottom of what now is called Sicily. And in addition to understanding certain other principles of mathematics and such he’s coined this great phrase, give me a fulcrum, and a lever, and I can move the world. And that’s just what Joe told us. If you can use leverage, then who you are, let’s say you weigh 150 pounds, you can move something that weighs 600-800-2000 pounds, depending how you use your leverage. And the same thing in business. You want to utilize your time, your talents, and your strategy to maximize your effort. So in the few minutes we have remaining Joe, I want you to spend just literally two minutes and go deep into one particular strategy that you think is a bedrock foundational process for LinkedIn.

Joe Apfelbaum:

So, I have this book right here, and in chapter 40 I talk about creating the perfect templates and email for direct messages. If you don’t have templates prepared in advance, and we give all our students a whole list of different templates that work, if you don’t have templates for follow up. Remember, the fortune is not in showing up. A lot of people like showing up and throwing up. I say instead of showing up and throwing up, show up and follow up because the fortune is in the follow up. And so, how are you going to follow up after you go to an event and there’s 30 people there and you want to follow up with five but then you have a bunch of meetings and you never end up following up. And you never end up getting the benefits of the relationship. So, as soon as I get home I make a list of the people that are there and I send them a bunch of templates using software and we teach everyone how to use those technologies. We give them the templates, teach them how to add it to their technology, how to integrate it. When I go to your profile right now, Barry, I can send you emails, I can send you direct messages, click click, click, click send, send, send, and I don’t have to really think about it because the templates are created in advance. If you are not preparing to scale you may as well prepare to fail.

Barry Shore:

Either you scale and sail into the sunset or you’re going to fail and be on the floor and say, why didn’t I listen to Joe? So we got three questions, and then we’re going to have to pack it up because his time is so there. First question, wonderful Joe. Are you ready?

Joe Apfelbaum:

Yes.

Barry Shore:

Will you come back again?

Joe Apfelbaum:

I will come back again in health, in blessings, and in love. And I would be joyed and enjoyed to do it.

Barry Shore:

Thank you. Number two, you have 80 seconds only to answer this, ready? 

Joe Apfelbaum:

I’m ready. 

Barry Shore:

What is your most fervent desire?

Joe Apfelbaum:

My most fervent desire is for everyone to be healthy and happy. And to be able to make a difference in the world and to find your own purpose because so many people are stuck not knowing what their purpose is. I wrote a book called “High Energy Purpose,” how to find your internal purpose and tie it to your external purpose. And most people are just spinning their wheels, they’re not feeling fulfilled. Success and fulfillment are not the same thing. So, I want people to know that. I want to help more entrepreneurs go from frustration to motivation. If you follow your frustration it’ll lead you to your greatest fear. And when you overcome your greatest fear that’s when your greatness exists. I just learned scuba diving. I used to be afraid of the ocean. And in order to get over my fear I had to take an online course and then get actual tactical training and do four dives in the ocean. And you’re a big swimmer so you know what I’m talking about. And then I learned about my breath and all that. So, I want you guys to get in touch with your purpose, with why you’re here. Because people do things for reasons. And I want you to have not excuses, I want you to have reasons that you want to be successful. And so for me, I want to make a difference in your life and support you.

Barry Shore:

And number three, are you ready for a hug in front of 366,822 people? And let me tell you when hug stands for, are you ready? Heartfelt, unlimited giving because that’s who you are. Heartfelt, unlimited giving. So the count of 3, 1-2-3 roar.

Joe Apfelbaum:

I love that. Thank you. And from me I have heartfelt, unlimited gratitude for you.

Barry Shore:

Attitude. Thank you. It’s another hug. We’ll do big hugs. We might even do an ugg later. You’re listening to The Joy of Living with your humble host, Barry Shore. Our amazing guest, Joe. By the way, as great as he is, and he’s wonderful. He is delightful as Barry is and he is delightful. This show is only about you Y-O-U, that’s why we’re here, for you to become the best you possible. That’s the reason you tuned in. And you know that on this show when you use the three fundamentals of life you will be as he says, happier, healthier and wealthier. Who doesn’t want that? The three fundamentals of course are life, your life has purpose as we just said. And number two, you lead a purpose-driven life you go mad. Mad stance for make a difference. Number three, unlock the power and the sequence of everyday words and terms such as www what a wonderful world. Smile, see miracles in life every day. As my eight-year-old niece says, see miracles in everyday life. Create the kind of world you want to live in causing, rethinking, listen to Joe, causing, rethinking, enabling all to excel. Use strategy in your life. Use four letter words because in our world, the world of the positive, purposeful, powerful and pleasant, the four letter words that we use our love, life, hope, grow, free, gift, swim, pray, play and tell the world F U add capital N capital N right away. They say, where’d you get that, I listen to Barry Shore and The Joy of Living.

Joe Apfelbaum:

With networking it’s follow up. F U stands for follow up and networking.

Barry Shore:

Follow up networking nicely. And use the two most powerful words in the English language. By the way, this is also what you do when you follow up. Use these two most powerful words in the English language at least three times a day. Thank you. Thank you, thank you to harmonize and network kindness. That’s the ultimate networking. This is what Joe really talks about. The ultimate networking is to harmonize and network kindness because when you do everything flows from there. As he says you want the energy to flow and go forth. Our blessing from Joey and I is to go forth live exuberantly, spread the seeds of joy, happiness, peace and love. Go mad. Go make a difference. Joe, don’t go away.

Outro  

Thank you for listening to this episode of The Joy of Living Podcast. Now, that’s another step towards your healthier, happier and wealthier life. Never hesitate to do good in the world no matter what the situation. Join us for another upbeat discussion next time at barryshore.com. And be sure to leave a rating and subscribe to the show to get more conversations like this. And remember to share it with your family and friends too. See you on the next episode.

About Joe Apfelbaum


Joe Apfelbaum is the CEO of Ajax Union a B2B digital marketing agency, he is the author of High Energy Networking a book that teaches professionals how to build relationships in business and he is a LinkedIn trainer teaching sales professionals how to network on LinkedIn. Joe is a single dad to his 5 beautiful children.